What should I do to marry a rich guy?

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Ok, before you ask me when Jarushub turned into Romancehub, this is just a joke from stockmarketnigeria.com lol

Well, TGIF anyway. Afterall, all work but no fun makes Jarushub followers ****lips sealed*****

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A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum :

I’m going to be honest of what I’m going to say here. I’m 25 this year. I’m very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above. You might say that I’m greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York . My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married?

I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you? Among those I’ve dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit. If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west side of New York City, $250k annual income is not enough.

I’m here humbly to ask a few questions:

1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)

2) Which age group should I target?

3) Why most wives of the riches is only average-looking? I’ve met a few girls who don’t have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys

4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)

Ms. Pretty

Awesome reply:
Dear Ms. Pretty,

I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor. My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I’m not wasting time here. From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain.

Put the details aside, what you’re trying to do is an exchange of “beauty” and “money”: Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square. However, there’s a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can’t be prettier year after year. Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It’s not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worried 10 years later.

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a “trading position”. If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term – same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or “leased”. Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advise that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy.

And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income. This has better chance than finding a rich fool.

Hope this reply helps. If you are interested in “leasing” services, do contact me…

Signed,

CEO
J.P. Morgan

 

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And oops, did you realize we just taught you ABC of investment? Now, say the truth and shame the devil, would you have opened this thread if it was titled ‘ABC of Investment’ ? Who no wan learn how to marry a rich man. lol

4 comments

  1. Isah Sharafadeen Lanre 20 September, 2013 at 16:25 Reply

    Hmm, another attestation to the fact that ‘a book must never be judged by its cover’! What a way to pass an information across, the lesson is quite deep. Many thanks to the team ‘JARUS’. Cheers!

  2. emmanuel ewumi 20 September, 2013 at 17:04 Reply

    That Investment banker was too blunt and harsh on that lady, I did something similar during my single days although I was a bit diplomatic.

    A responsible woman should not see her beauty as her only asset.

  3. Lawatog 27 May, 2014 at 16:36 Reply

    Investors are always very sensitive in respect of the returns on their investments. Most investors : those that belong to the school of thought of J.M Keynes do not even believe in the long run, for in the long run we are all dead.

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